I'm speechless

When I was about my son's age, I recall that the only after-school class was the one for detention, where you had to color in the little squares on graph paper for an hour. Even now I can't look at mosaic tiles without feeling slightly guilty!.

Nowadays there is a whole range of after-school activities available (for a fee of course), but even so, there are a lot of options; Cross-country, Lego robotics, speech, leaders of tomorrow, skiing, lacrosse, math counts....This year my son has decided to try the Speech class.

I am amazed at what is required of these kids! Not only do they have to give a speech in a competition setting, but they also have to write and memorize their speech. It has to be 8 minutes long and address something other than "10 reasons why I hate school" or "my favorite Wii game" or "How to get a high score on Bejewelled Blitz". Robert's chosen topic is "How technology at work causes stress at home". Surprisingly he has needed very little help from me in writing the speech, but I did find myself doing some research on the causes of stress - actually, I didn't have to research that much, I found I had a whole bunch of real-life examples at my fingertips! The speech is written now so all he has to do is memorize it and learn how to deliver it, all in the next 2 weeks. No small feat to fit in amongst all the homework he has in 8th grade. I hope he doesn't get too stressed about it all...

SkyMall - "The Litter Kwitter"

Another post in my series of commentaries on the SkyMall magazine. On the flight home yesterday I was intrigued by the SkyMall advert for the "The Litter Kwitter" - this is a series of toilet seat inserts that you can use to potty train your kitty - no more litter boxes...the cat uses the toilet like the rest of us. I have images in my mind of the owner banging on the bathroom door shouting "get a move on Fluffy, I'm bursting out here!"  Next step is to teach Fluffy how to flush....

Slap yo Momma Chilli!

For the final evening of our leadership forum in Tucson we had a "chilli cook-off". Medals were awarded to the team that cooked the best chilli, had the best presentation and had the best "team chant". My team did not win any medals. Now I don't want this to sound like sour grapes or anything, and I promise you I would say the same if my team had won medals, but quite honestly and sincerely, hand on heart and all that, the winners must have bribed the judges.....

How could you not award first prize to the "Slap yo momma Chilli" team? (ok, ok...I don't get it either, it must be a Texas thing - thank you Mark). To be fair, our chilli was the only one that had some kick to it. Everyone's else's chilli was wimpy. In my opinion a chilli needs to have some bite to it. Who the hell needs that extra skin on your tongue anyway.

Our 'Chilli chant' was both moving and profound; I can hardly bring myself to repeat it here, but for the sake of providing you with a full pcture of the evening I will....

"You wanted the best, we've got the best, the hottest chilli in the West, Slap yo momma chilli!"

Brings a tear to your eye right?

Anyway, my team don't need a medal to tell us how awesome we are. Nice job to Scott(head chef), Mark (chant chief), Steinar (server), Larry (....ummm, I'm sure Larry did something) and myself (apron designer).

I'm sure the whole episode taught us a lot of useful stuff. Give me a few days and it will come to me what that was....

Next time don't go on fire

I had to include this YouTube clip - taken from the BBC comedy Big Train.  It was shown at our leadership forum to illustrate that feedback, when given,  should be useful.

Walkie-Talkie

Funny video from comedian Brian Regan.

Bug off, you critters!

This week I am in Tucson, Arizona for a conference. The weather is beautiful, as are the views and the hotel. However there is one thing that concerns me;  Arizona is known for its bugs, snakes, and generally scary wildlife. You know you are "not in Kansas anymore Toto", when there are signs dotted around the hotel grounds saying "Beware, wildlife is dangerous". The signs I am more used to in the UK are "Beware, bar closes at 11pm", so this is a bit of a shock to me.

The hotel staff cheerfully told us about the family of bobcats that live around the hotel, and I also heard tales of mountain lions that come visit in the mornings. A collegue here at the conference was running on the treadmill in the hotel gym when he spotted a 'hand-sized spider' run under his treadmill. He had two options: to cut his run short or to finish it with the treadmill cranked up to 20 miles per hour in case the critter decided to surface. Being a true man he chose the latter. That'll teach that spider....

So far I have spent my week bent over scrutinizing the floor for bugs; people think this is how I walk naturally. All I know is, when I go to bed at night in my hotel room, I make sure I close the toilet lid down and make sure the plugs in the sink and shower are fully closed before I turn out the lights...the last thing I want is to wake up eye-to-eye with a furry tarantula or with a scorpion clasped to my nose.....

33 brave men

I can't let today pass by without a mention for the 33 brave miners who were trapped 2300 ft underground in a collapsed mine in Chile, since August 5th (69 days). The whole rescue effort from start to finish has been amazing and I've been glued to the TV and the internet at every opportunity, following the events in real time.

For 17 days the miners were cut off entirely, with no light, minimal food and little hope of rescue. The shift leader, Luis Urzua established rationing of the food they had. They survived on 2 spoonfuls of tuna, half a biscuit and a cup of milk every 48hrs. And then a vital link was established through a bore hole no wider than a grapefruit. The men attached a note to a microphone probe saying that all 33 men were in the shelter and were well.

That single event initiated a number of extensive drilling efforts, with one of the drills ("Plan B") finally breaking through into the shaft where the men were. The rescue operation to winch the men throough the shaft to safety started yesterday evening and culminated tonight with all 33 men rescued safely.

What an amazing, emotional event to witness, and today's technology meant that we not only had media coverage at the surface, but could also see the scenes below the surface in the mine.  What the miners must've been thinking as this rescue effort progressed is anybody's guess. I was very happy to see the last man emerge safely. It is definitely something that people will be talking about for a long time to come.

A Good Movie

Watched a movie for the first time in ages. We've just got Netflix setup (yes I know, most people have been using it for years) so I'm enjoying browsing and selecting things to watch. We watched "The Kite Runner" tonight, based on the book of the same name by Khaled Hosseini. Its been out for 3 years so I expect everyone except me has already seen it, but for the one or two that haven't I can recommend it, especially for those who have read the book. The Kite Runner tells the story of Amir, a young boy from Kabul, who befriends Hassan, the son of his father's Hazara servant. The story is set against a backdrop of tumultuous events, from the fall of Afghanistan's monarchy through the Soviet invasion, the mass exodus of refugees to Pakistan and the United States, and the rise of the Taliban regime.Good acting and very interesting to see how people live in these countries. Highly recommended.

A modern intercom

To add to my previous post on the overuse of technology in my household, I do admit to being a fan of Skype, which I use to communicate with my parents in the UK. However I probably take it a bit too far when I "Skype" my daughter who is upstairs in her bedroom, to tell her to get ready for bed. Lazy or what?!

The art of conversation is dead

In years past people used to comment that TV killed the art of conversation. Nowadays, I believe that computers have taken over this role. I say that based on the fact that its Saturday night and my son,  husband and myself are sitting together in the Family room, no more than 3 feet apart. We each have our laptop on our, well, on our laps (duh!), and we are communicating via Facebook. Is there something wrong with this image?

Easy for you to say!

My daughter brought up an interesting point. If you were traveling around Wales using a GPS/Sat Nav, I wonder if it would allow you to type in "Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch"? This is the name of a village on the Welsh island of Anglesey that has the longest place name in Europe and one of the longest place names in the world. The name means: St Mary's Church (Llanfair) in a hollow (pwll) of white hazel (gwyngyll) near (goger) the swirling whirlpool (y chwyrndrobwll) of the church of St Tysilio (llantysilio) with a red cave ([a]gogo goch). The approximate pronunciation in English orthography is given as: Llan-vire-pooll-guin-gill-go-ger-u-queern-drob-ooll-llandus-ilio-gogo-goch.

A flick of the wrist is all you need

Have you noticed that watching someone manipulating their iPad is like watching someone trying to rub a greasy spot off a window? Whats with all the frantic hand movements and furious flicking of the fingers? Why can't they use a keyboard like everyone else? Show-offs!

Make a splash

How to get rid of a motorcyclist that insists on riding too close behind your car? Drive your car through a big puddle and watch him appreciate the big splash you make....he'll soon backoff. Been there! Done that!

Too much child support

If I ever take to driving a Hyundai Santa Fe with "family car stickers" on the back window,  you can cart me off to the "sanatorium for over enthusiastic soccer mums"....








(This sticker is quite cool though...)

Life lessons....

I have learned a few lessons tonight. I received two new yoga DVDs in the mail and was eager to try them out:

Lesson #1 - do not do yoga poses on the floor when the cat is next to you, nose licking and hair chewing is not part of the routine.
Lesson #2 - do not drink a couple of glasses of wine before attempting the tree pose.
Lesson #3 -I don't know what it means to make my eyes "easy" or "soft", but I think I can "find my center".
Lesson #4 - lycra shorts and pony tails are kind of off-putting

The rubber gloves will be next....

Just back from a short trip to Texas (Richardson to be exact, just north of Dallas). I had the worst experience on the outward journey thanks to the over-zealous Logan airport security. First of all it is now mandatory to walk through a whole body imaging machine, the kind that show a virtually naked image of you. You have to link your hands over your head for this, very uncomfortable in more ways than one. After that a big, female security guard was waiting to "pat me down". That is a strange way of describing what involved her rubbing her hands over all of my body while I had to stand there looking like the Da Vinci Vitruvian man. I felt humiliated. Then to cap it all off, a male security guard emptied my case of its contents, undies and all, and confiscated a bottle of hair styling cream. Not just any old "Walmart" styling cream, but "Bumble and Bumble", $30 a bottle styling cream. I was mortified, and furious at the same time. Enough was enough! I have to admit that I forgot my role as a respectable wife and mother for one minute and directed a number of colorful descriptive phrases in his direction. I didn't calm down until I arrived at my hotel and had downed a couple of large Margaritas. Travel! It was never good, now it is a nightmare. I hate it!!

Imagine waking up next to this?

I followed one of those Ad links off a website I was viewing, to arrive at an advertisement with the title "Sleep research leads to a simple snoring solution". Its not that I snore (apparently I don't), but I was fascinated by the picture that accompanied the advert. This "simple" device supposedly prevents snoring. Good grief! Why not just stick some duct tape over your mouth and be done with it?!

A terrible day caught on camera

Just been watching a program on the History channel about the events of 9/11/2001. It was a program made up of snippets of film taken by people on the street at the time. It was very moving, and at the same time shocking to see how bad things were when the towers were on fire. The TV news reports all concentrated on the towers burning, and ultimately falling. But this footage showed the panic of the people on the streets and in nearby apartments, not knowing whether they should run or stay where they were. And when the towers collapsed, the enormous cloud of dust and debris that rolled through the streets at incredible speeds, as the people all tried to outrun it. Very scary stuff. I thank my lucky stars that I was not there at the time. In fact, I was many miles away in Madrid, in the middle of a meeting with a customer. I was meant to fly home the next day but of course, that didn't happen. I remember being worried that I would never get back and see my family, and checking out whether it was possible to get a cruise or ferry from Spain to the US!! Seems silly now but at the time I was deadly serious.

Anyway, an excellent program from the History Channel. God bless all that lost their lives on that terrible day.

Hopefully not a 7 year itch?

My daughter Emma has come into contact with poison ivy. If you are not from the US, then you will have no idea what this is - I know its not something that grows in the UK anyway. Its an ivy-like plant that grows in wooded areas, and it releases an oil called urushiol that gets absorbed by the skin and causes itchy, oozy rashes. But the really nasty thing about it is that soap and water will not wash away the oil, and the oil will spread to anything it touches, including your clothes or any other part of the body. Therefore it spreads very easily. So far Emma has it in varying amounts on her torso, legs, arms, face and feet. There are various products on the market to help get rid of it, and lots of home remedies too. I am trying the "Tecnu Extreme poison ivy scrub", dishwasher soap and caladryl routine currently. We'll see if it works. Makes a stingy nettle seem irrelevant. Nasty stuff.

Makes me feel homesick

I don't usually copy other's blog posts, but this is a bit of an exception being about my home town of Newport in South Wales. My brother in law Martin posted a YouTube clip of Goldie Looking Chain's "Newport State of Mind (You're not from Newport)" which was pretty good. But I personally like this version better, "cos I luvs the Welsh accent mun". Here it is in all its glory...Newport (Ymerodraeth State of Mind)

Cheesy jokes

Jokes from my kids (off the Cheezits commercials)...

What do you call cheese that is not yours?
Nacho Cheese!




Knock, knock
Who's there?
Interrupting Cheese
Interrupting Chee...
Cheese!

See yah!

First day back at school for the kids today. Parents everywhere are breathing a sigh of relief....

A day at the Races

We could not visit Saratoga Springs without paying a visit to the racecourse and seeing what all the fuss was about. I have never visited a racetrack before, even though my hometown in Wales was only about 15 miles from one.First of all I was amazed at how cheap it was to get in; $3 per person. Of course, they make the money on the food/drink and the betting!

It was a really fun afternoon. We could actually stand right next to the fence and see the horses thundering past us. On the TV its hard to appreciate just how fast they are going or how hard the horses are working. The sweat and the steam that comes off them after the race is amazing!

I was also fascinated by the jockeys. I knew that they were not generally six footers, but I didn't realize just how small they were! For some reason I kept thinking about the "Munchkins" from the Wizard of Oz....

All in all, a great day out with lots of excitement and atmosphere.

Saratoga - restaurant reviews

We went to a few decent restaurants while in Saratoga Springs, and one not so good one. We started off as we usually do looking for an Irish pub, and we found one called the Irish Times. It was nice enough sitting outside, but I can only assume people visit it for its beer, because the food was not up to much. Very average and not recommended.

Next we tried an Italian restaurant called Limoncello's. It had a good atmosphere, very lively. The food was reasonable, nothing to rave about, but the lemon martini's were scrummy! Ingredients were citrus vodka, limoncello liqueur, chambord and sour mix. I know what I shall be mixin' in my kitchen this weekend.

But our favorite place was called The Local Pub and Teahouse. Not sure where the Teahouse bit featured because it was very much like a British pub complete with dartboard. I had Welsh Rarebit on one visit, and Fish n' chips on the next (very adventurous....not). Probably the best Fish n' chips I've had since my last visit to a British chippy! All washed down with cider. You can't beat it.

Like Father..like Son

How quickly the time flies. One minute Tony is bouncing Robert up and down on his bed, the next its hard to tell them apart :)